Anger

Whistle-blowers, corruption, news articles, police interrogations, and intrigue were among the issues I dealt with this week.  Until we can get enough money to work full-time on the foundation and pay our bills, we have to have day jobs.

My day job takes me to Waterbury every morning.  Waterbury, CT is known far and wide for it’s political corruption.   I clean up litter, a glorious occupation.  Often times, the populace confuses me with community service.  “What’d you do to get this punishment?”  Or “Where does community court meet up in the morning?”  Are typical comments.

One of the employees for the Blight Program got fed up with our Waterbury Development Corp boss and demanded a transfer.  The request set of a chain of events culminating in the resignation of our boss, the transfer of a police officer in charge, and media attention.

In the past week and a half, I’ve been interviewed by three detectives and thrown under the bus per se, in the local newspaper.  I made it no secret, I didn’t like our boss, but as a temp employee, I wouldn’t get involved with removing him by myself.   It looks like our group is part of the problem and corrupt itself.  This is untrue.

Being dragged through the mud and trying to watch out for our group, has been taking it’s toll on me.  I haven’t been able to sleep well.  However, my lack of anger towards the Whistle-blower surprises me.

I feel for him. He’s a drunk, no question and lives a terrible lifestyle, but blames others.  I’d caused some of his ire, trying to help and he tossed our group aside like nothing.  He acts like nothing happened and everything’s okay.  I cannot for the life of me get angry at this man.  I take my lack of rage to be a sign of my self improvement through therapy, the Vet Center, and the Art Foundation over the past couple of years.  No longer do I look for conflict and my road rage has subsided greatly.  I wouldn’t say I’m happy, but far from a rage-a-holic.   Improving one’s life takes time, something we don’t always have patience for.

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